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I met my current husband as a sugar baby. This is a secret nobody else in the world knows except for me and him. But it’s liberating because I can be honest with the one I love and he loves me for who I am too.
I was earning big money then with a few long term arrangements that all paid me a hefty sum every month. I didn’t even escort as I’m very selective about who I meet.
And I agree with you. It’s fun, it’s thrilling, and it’s so…….. damn easy. But ultimately it’s not sustainable in the long run because all of these are just superficial. As much as you are showered with money and attention, at the end of the day you are just expendable. You might be at your prime now but if you let years pass by and you sink deeper and deeper, one day you will look back and realize you cannot turn back anymore. And you’ll probably end up being a mistress or 3rd party type of relationship for the rest of your life. There will always be a prettier and younger girl out there.
One of the men I was meeting wanted to marry me, I freaked out and ended things and he hounded me for months.
As for my husband? We clicked immediately after just meeting one time. Mentally and physically everything was perfect. I can’t even describe it. And since that day we met, I stopped meeting any other men, even the ones who adored me and paid me so well. Granted, my husband is rich but throughout our marriage we been through ups and downs. Even when his business failed I stuck by him and now he has come back stronger than ever. And he loves me so much. Even during the times when things were tough, I had zero thoughts of going back to being a SB. Today, we are rewarded with a soulmate kind of love, and a happy family. Our relationship is filled with simple joys of daily life and utmost respect for each other.
All I want to tell you is, if you even love your boyfriend, you won’t be able to continue having s** or meeting other men. I obviously don’t judge you for the way you earn money but to me it’s quite simple, it’s hard to fathom even letting someone else touch me.
I don’t think you are ready for a relationship yet. You got to let him go since you are not capable of being honest or loyal.
You’ll need to find a partner who knows your past and accepts it. This is crucial in having a fulfilling life in future because of the nature of your past and at the end of the day, lies will destroy you. Unless you have stopped and is ok with hiding this truth forever but it just seems that you can’t for now.
You asked if can you keep both, sure, but can your future husband continue fu*king other girls while being married to you?…. BS right?
This is your life you can do whatever you want but you need to accept your consequences. I’ve been out of this for 5 years now and I love that I can live life HONESTLY. I am not ashamed of my past at all.. there’s nothing wrong with a transaction between willing parties. But at the end of the day it’s just feelings of emptiness and fast money. I know it won’t last forever and I know I would spiral the longer I’m in it as morals and values started getting blurred. I won’t go back anymore. There’s way more to life than this.
I hope you find it in you too to make the right decisions.

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